Because will.i.am Said I Should!

Oh no!  Where have I been?

Yes, it’s been something like two weeks since my last post.  I apologize.  Sometimes life gets in the way of your best intentions.  I wish I could say something monumental happened to me that has kept me from posting, but alas I cannot.  Instead, I’ve taken up yet another hobby—improving upon myself in a way that I haven’t done for a while.

I’m learning a new language!  Actually, I’m learning several.  One is Vietnamese, which is what my wife’s family speaks.  I’ve tried learning it a handful of times before, but now I actually have some mp3s to listen to while I drive.  My wife understands it well but doesn’t really speak it, so that hinders my learning, as it’s always best to be surrounded by a language to really learn it.  Still, I often like to know what my in-laws are talking about, and instead of recognizing a handful of words like I have for years, maybe in a few months I’ll be able to recognize several dozen.  So that’s one thing I’ve been up to.

The other languages I’m learning are programming languages.  Not since my days in college have I spent actual time learning something like this.  In high school and college I learned Turbo Pascal and C++, and somewhere along the line I learned how to design a webpage in HTML and CSS, but it’s been so long that my skills were beyond rusty.  And Javascript didn’t exist back then, or at least if it did, it wasn’t in my curriculum.  But beyond just brushing up on HTML and CSS and learning Javascript, I plan on learning PHP, jQuery, and perhaps even Python, Ruby, and a bunch of others.

How am I doing this?  Through www.codeacademy.com for now.  And the best part is that codeacademy.com is free.  You just sign up and start learning.  Piece of cake.

Why am I doing this?  Because Bill Gates and will.i.am said I should.  No seriously, as an IT Manager, I’ve always felt programming was one of my weaker skills, and yet I come across instances on a daily basis where I wish I could tweak something without contacting a vendor or create my own content.  And technology is so prevalent in our world that it’s really silly not to at least understand how computers do what they do.  Ultimately I might mesh my writing and programming skills together in some fashion for a new website or business—we’ll see.  But I have to start somewhere.  And it’s always a smart idea to pad your resume with skills pertinent to your field.

But even beyond that, I see it as something refreshing and fun to do.  I always read or hear about people being bored.  I’m never bored.  In fact, I never seem to have enough time to accomplish everything I want.  And even when I’m doing nothing, I find myself playing dumb games on my phone like Words with Friends or Candy Crush Saga (literally 3 HOURS one night this week).

Technology is a pretty handy tool, but it’s such a huge field that it’s impossible to know everything.  And it’s constantly changing.  So I suggest if you are ever bored, delve into the world of technology.  Learn a programming language like me, or get yourself a smart phone or a tablet.  Surf the web—you can spend hours upon hours on sites like www.buzzfeed.com or www.stumbleupon.com.  Make yourself some new friends on Twitter and chat away.  Shop (enough said).  Or research stuff like zombie ants or nanotechnology or bog bodies.

I’m not advocating keeping your nose glued to a mobile device or PC monitor all day, because getting outside and playing or going for a walk or jog is much more vital to your health.  But the next time you are sitting around your house bored, depressed, or lonely, just sit down at your computer or download some apps on your phone and do something with yourself—even if it is just playing Candy Crush Saga for 3 hours.

Perceived Anonymity and Invincibility on the Internet

What would we do without the Internet?  All of those wonderful games we play on our phones?  Emailing and texting and Skyping?  The ability to Google anything and everything?  I remember when I was a teenager and wanted to know something, I’d either ask my dad (who seemingly knew EVERYTHING) or I’d go dig in the back of my closet for twenty-year-old encyclopedias that still listed North and South Vietnam as two separate countries.  It’s amazing I was able to write coherent and relevant term papers in high school!

Now people can literally spend all day trolling the Internet—especially social media and news sites.  I think humans, as a function of their existence, thrive on vicarious drama, and there’s no better place to find drama than Facebook.

I have one friend on Facebook who is constantly posting quarrels he’s having with his girlfriend.  He doesn’t even tag her in the posts.  He just says things like, “Oh, I see how it is.  Wait until the tides turn, you *#$%*#.”  He'll even comment on his post with another crass remark, almost as if he's talking to himself like a lunatic.  No joke!  People have commented under his posts saying he should keep his pre-marital strife out of the public realm, but that does not deter him.

Today I was reading a post by the local radio DJ about a teenager with severe scoliosis.  Sadly I couldn’t write this blog entry sooner, but her family was collecting donations at Sam’s Club in Altoona from like 10 AM to 6 PM.  It was a great post to share on the part of the DJ, something honorable and thoughtful, and the family was hoping that the publicity would raise $7000 for her treatment.  And then I read the comments…

The post didn’t actually mention the girl’s name, and so someone asked for it, saying she’d like to know who she’s donating money to before she drives over.  People started bashing her, saying the name of the girl or family shouldn’t matter, and she started bashing back, saying she donates all the time and attends church benefits and blah blah blah.  I think I read maybe ten posts of this lady arguing with two or three others, calling each other names and whatnot.  Absolutely ridiculous.

This was a great post to benefit this poor girl.  And people were fighting about it.  What is wrong with people?

Well, I might be able to provide a partial answer to that.  The Internet has given us all a sense of perceived anonymity and invincibility.  We think that we can type away our thoughts and feelings, no matter how crass or immoral, and that nobody can stop us.  Some might have a devil-may-care attitude about life in general.  Others might be under the impression that they don’t have many actual friends that they routinely congress with, and so even if they have hundreds or thousands of followers or friends on their social media sites, none of them are paying any attention to what they post.  Wrong.

My case in point, another social media friend of mine, a person who has always seemed to struggle with his self-esteem, shared an extremely vulgar picture, and in the comments an aunt or other type of authority figure stated that she should wash his mouth out with soap.  His response: “I’m 27 years-old now.  I can say what I want.”

I wasn’t at all surprised to see his vulgar post, because it was par for the course with him, but I was surprised by his comment.  I really believe that people seem to think they can say what they want on the Internet with no repercussions.  And that’s a bit scary to me that some of us have devolved to that point.

Any human resource manager or boss looking to hire someone and worth his/her salary is going to delve through social media sites before making an offer.  It’s the same idea as researching a product on the Internet before purchasing it.  You want to know what you’re getting before you commit.  And so yeah, I guess people can say whatever they want, but I certainly hope they won’t ever have the need to hunt for a job in the future.  And forget about running for a public office!

What really troubles me is that people would not say these types of things in actual public.  Like this lady asking for the name of this poor girl, if she just happened to be shopping at Sam’s Club and saw her asking for donations, she’d probably drop a few cents in the jar and be on her way.  She’s not going to walk up to the disabled girl and ask her name or interrogate her.  And she’s not going to get in a public argument with someone else over something so trivial.  People shy away from arguments in public, because it creates a scene, and natural human behavior forces most people to avoid scenes.

But not on the Internet, yet it is still a public setting.  It’s actually possibly even more public than a physical location, because rather than having maybe twenty people gape at your pointless and insensitive argument, you now have hundreds if not thousands—especially when you do it in the comments under the post of a local celebrity.  Are some people just too dense to understand that?

The Internet can be a very scary thing at times, and I’m not talking about malware or hackers or NSFW content popping up on the screen while trying to show your boss an important document.  I’m talking about the fact that people have this perceived anonymity and invincibility when using it.  I’m sorry people, but that’s just not the case.  Unless you are using some fake name to comment (which is an entirely different issue possibly requiring some psychological therapy in most cases), you aren’t anonymous.  And when you say things that make you look like a donkey butt, don’t be surprised when you run into a cousin or high school friend or fellow churchgoer and the person gives you the cold shoulder.  Because you are not invincible either.

I’ve said my peace.

Therapy Thursday - Can't Make This Stuff Up!

So every Thursday morning the local radio station, Hot 92 and Hot 100, holds a Therapy Thursday.  They ask people to write in with dilemmas they may be having and prompt the listening audience to chime in either by calling or posting on Facebook.

I’m always flabbergasted (love that word) by the people requesting therapy.  They always seem to be childish, inane, or else their message is lacking some integral component of the entire situation.  Most of the issues deal with relationships, which can be expected considering the amount of drama churned up by romantic conflict between sexes.

But this morning’s Therapy Thursday issue was a doozy.  I’ve posted a copy of the Facebook post below:

I have to admit that I laughed HARD when I read this.  And then I read it twice, just to make sure I wasn’t seeing things.  Oh my.  Where do I begin??

OK, first of all, this guy is so contradictory in his statement that I’ll bet he spends twenty minutes just deciding on a flavor of toothpaste in the grocery store.  “Confused?”  Yeah, you said it.  So your fiancée is intelligent, has a beautiful personality, beautiful eyes, and a phenomenal body?  Even one or two out of the four should be enough for most men, but not for this guy.  He complains about her slouchy, foot-dragging walk, feral manners, oily skin, and not-so-bad breath.  I’m sorry, but that does not describe an attractive person.  It almost sounds like he’s describing an animal!  So what’s the deal, buddy?  Are you engaged to your pet hamster?

Second, I love his descriptive details.  This guy wins first place for how insulting a person can be (BTW, first place prize is a kick to the groin from your fiancée).  I mean, he obviously has given her flaws a lot of thought to have those adjectives in mind while writing this up.  You really think that about the woman you’ve been with for FIVE YEARS?  Repulsed?  Never really attracted to her?  Did you go blind about five years ago and now suddenly had your vision restored?  I’m repulsed by raw sewage.  I don’t think I’ve ever been repulsed by a person’s mannerisms and features.  Horrified, maybe, but repulsed?  And this is the woman you sleep in the same bed with??

And so what, you think she loves every little thing about you?  The excessive hair on your back?  Your unibrow or nasty facial hair?  Your loud snoring or the way your armpits smell like a Subway restaurant after a long day’s work?

Note, ahem, I did not just describe myself…

What makes you so freakin’ special that you can point out her flaws, saying that’s why you aren’t attracted to her, and yet she has to put up with yours?  You think you don’t have any negative qualities that she overlooks?  Are you that much of a narcissist?

Third, and this is the best, he talks about cheating on her rather than breaking off the engagement and ending the relationship.  So not only is he not attracted to her, but he doesn’t respect her enough to call it quits.  And he even compares her to old bologna.  OLD BOLOGNA?!?  Wow.  Wow.

My point isn’t to beat up on this moron, although I’m enjoying it.  My point is that narcissism seems to be rampant in our society.  People are so self-centered and focused on themselves that, just like this guy, they’ll hurt even those closest to them because they are bored, disillusioned, lazy, or pick-a-reason without any thought whatsoever as to how the other person feels.  And not only that, but they'll post their attitude for the whole world to see!  This me-me-me attitude that I observe so often HAS TO STOP if the people of our nation ever want it to continue being a civilized super-power.

Maybe I’m just too old-school.  I purposely don’t rock the boat.  I don’t tailgate or drive slow as a tortoise, am overly conscious of where my cart is in the super-market so as not to block the aisle, keep my lips shut when I know my words may be hurtful, etc.  I remain low-key, mostly out of sight, allowing others to showboat around the room while I stand back, watch, listen, and evaluate.  It’s not that I’m shy or introverted or anything—it’s that I’m respectful of others in that regard.  And in all the observing and evaluating I’ve done in my life, I’ve learned a thing or two about how to treat others.

But, man, when I read garbage like this, I feel like a dying breed.

I hope this dude’s fiancée reads this and realizes her hubby-to-be was the author.  Because this dude needs to learn the hard way—still favoring that kick to the groin lesson, but simply dumping him would suffice.  And I hope this guy’s therapy request is a lesson for the rest of us.  There is more to life than what’s going on in our own little heads.  You may not like some particular thing about your significant other/friend/coworker/whatever, but those are people who are a part of your life, and it’s best to just ignore it.

Unless of course that person smells like a Subway restaurant CONSTANTLY…maybe in that case you should have a little talk with him/her.

Promoting Yourself on Twitter

As an “Indie” author, I can say that getting your name out there can be frustrating—especially if you are intent on getting recognized.  I’ve always somewhat shied away from the limelight, only because I don’t want that type of complication in my life.  Yes, I’d love to sell more books (who wouldn’t?), but that’s not why I write.  I write because I love telling stories.  If I suddenly became a world-famous author, I wouldn’t complain, but that’s not my ultimate goal.

Yes, I’ve submitted dozens of query letters to agents.  It’s amusing to me how some will be courteous enough to send you a rejection letter while others won’t even acknowledge you sent them your work.  I know that if I ever became a literary agent, I would at least respect the people who took the time to send submissions to me.  But the literary world is also changing, and ebooks are all the rage now.  You don’t need an agent to publish your book today with tools like Amazon KDP and Smashwords.  Promoting your book, on the other hand, is a different beast altogether.

Obviously I’m not an expert on promoting books.  Otherwise I’d be popping up on best seller’s lists.  But I have humbly amassed a moderately-sized Twitter following just by being a writer and following other writers.  It hasn’t been too terribly difficult to do, either.  For a while when I started I would add followers and then delete those who didn’t follow back.  And I would interact with those people who followed me by conversing and retweeting.  I did this for several months—long enough to get past the pesky 2000 following threshold, and now I have well over 6000 followers.  I don’t really follow people first now either.  Every day I’ll get ten to fifteen followers, and I’ll choose the real people (not bots and spammers), interact with them, and follow them back.  And it seems to work well.

Why is this important?  Well, when I would tweet a promotion for one of my books or a blog post prior to amassing the followers I have now, I would receive maybe 10 hits.  Now when I do it, I get between 50 and 100.  Bumping up your number of Twitter followers has its advantages, and so for anyone just starting out, I’d suggest you invest some time in Twitter.

After all, all of these SEO and book marketing people do the same thing.  They follow people in droves, then unfollow those who haven’t followed back, then try to get money from you to promote your work to all the followers they’ve amassed.  Why pay money to those people when you can just do that yourself?

One mistake I see people make all the time is that they’ll hit that 2000 following limit, then go in and indiscriminately unfollow a bunch of people so that they are only following a few hundred.  This is absolutely one of the worst Twitter moves you can do if you want to amass a ton of followers.  First of all, for those who do follow you, it’s annoying.  I took the time and effort (really just a second and a click--why am I complaining?) to follow you, so when you stop following me, that means to me that you aren’t interested in what I have to say.  I waste no time whatsoever unfollowing those who aren’t following me back.  A few times a week I’ll use one utility or another (Who Unfollowed Me, Twitter Karma when it works) to list the people that aren’t following me back, and I’ll unfollow those people.  I’m always amazed, too, at how many people show up in this list.  Smart Twitter users who actively manage their followings aren’t going to fall for it.  And the second issue with indiscriminately mass unfollowing is that if you attempt to follow more people after you’ve already unfollowed most of your followers, chances are you’ll just be following the same people again—people who are already following you in the first place.  I’ve seen at least a dozen instances of someone following me, me following back, that person then unfollowing me, me unfollowing back, and then that person following again.  Had I not unfollowed them like a smart Tweeter, they would all be wasting their time following me back a second time.  Sure, you may be able to get past that 2000 following limit by doing this, but as people start to unfollow you back, your numbers are going to dive.  Not the way to do it, folks.  Twitter isn't all about you.

If you are following 2000 people and only have 1000 followers, you need to unfollow a lot of folks.  There was a time when I would follow celebs, but that became tedious and boring.  Celebrities just don’t interest me—they are just people like you and me—people with big paychecks and cameras shoved into their faces, but who often have nothing more to offer than a hundred other people you may follow.  And celebs aren’t going to follow you back.  They aren’t going to converse with you.  Why bother?  Subscribe to their Facebook pages or an RSS celeb feed instead, because chances are if some celeb tweeted something interesting or shocking, you’ll read all about it there.

Keep your following/followers numbers roughly the same, and you’ll have no problem bypassing that 2000 following limit.  Oh, and take advantage of the bots and fake people who follow you.  Many people will report those accounts as spam, but I don’t.  I just don’t follow those accounts back—allowing them to pad my number of followers until they are eventually deleted.  I think Twitter allows you to follow only 10% more people than are following you after you reach 2000, so as long as you have over 1800 followers, you can keep on following.  Just make sure you always unfollow those who aren’t following you back.

It takes time.  I’ve been working at it for several years now.  Every day it grows a little bigger, and every day the hits to my blog and book sites go up a bit more.  Just keep at it.  Keep following back, unfollowing those who aren’t following you back, and tweeting, retweeting, and conversing with others.  The more you do, the more success you’ll see.

Oh, and don’t forget to keep writing!  For a while there I think I spent more time each evening on Twitter than I did actually writing.  Managing your Twitter followers should only take ten or fifteen minutes per day at the most.

Hope that helps!

Please Ignore My Ranting

Just to forewarn you, this post is nothing more than a compilation of complaints.  If you don’t like listening or reading about someone whining over trivial matters, move on to the next tweet or Facebook post or whatever in your list.

Since my second son was born nearly three weeks ago, I’ve been driving straight to work rather than the circuitous route I previously took to drop my first-born off at school and my wife off at her job.  Yes, my wife drives, but we enjoyed spending our mornings together by carpooling, and it naturally saves on gas.  Anyway, she’s been at home with baby since mid-January, and I’ve been driving a different route straight to work.  And I don’t know if I hadn’t paid as much attention before, but these past few weeks have proven to me that people drive like idiots.  Yeah, I said it.  Idiots.

This past week alone I’ve had four people tailgate me relentlessly, watched three people blatantly run red lights, saw well over ten people run stop signs in my neighborhood, and nearly saw an accident that could have been fatal (car turned left into, of all places, a methadone clinic right in front of a huge box truck).

What’s the rush, people?  Traffic signals and speed limits are optional because you couldn't wake up five minutes earlier?

A couple of months ago, some local guy was killed while checking his mail because a driver was speeding to get to work.  I’ve almost been THAT GUY way too many times.  My house sits at the beginning of a long stretch of flat, straight road, and despite posted 25 mph signs, people will fly down it at speeds in excess of 40 or even 50 mph.  My mailbox sits along the side of the road right before a bend to the left, and often when another car is coming in the opposite direction, people will drive off the road to avoid the other car.  That is, off the road directly where I stand to check my mail.

Seriously, what’s the rush, people?  Getting to your destination is more important than the life of another human being?

For all my readers out there, please slow down.  If you hit someone who is walking or checking his/her mail, like me, that’s on you.  There’s no defense for driving too fast and striking a pedestrian.  And if you know someone that speeds, please encourage that person to slow down as well.

I’m not done with this little rant just yet.  Switching topics completely, I have a tremendous amount of respect for my wife.  In the three weeks since our baby was born, she’s been up three to four times a night feeding and changing him.  This baby is the loudest baby I’ve ever been around, grunting and passing gas and screaming when he gets hungry.  Last night I heard her say, “Please, Ben, I’ve only had an hour of sleep so far,” and I turned and looked at the clock and saw it was 3:30 AM.  I know some fathers get up during the wee hours of night to tend to newborns, but I’ll admit that I’ve never been great at doing that.  Luckily my wife has been able to take time off with the baby, and I know that when she goes back to work I’ll have to start picking up some of the slack (or else we’ll be going to bed at 8 every night).  But my wife is one heck of a great mommy.

Some women aren’t cut out for motherhood.  Some would choose to focus on their career or are frightened by the thought of raising a little one.  And I have no problem with women who personally decide not to have kids.  It’s their choice, and I have a tremendous respect for people, both men and women, who make choices and stick to them.  Parenthood isn’t for everyone.

But sometimes I am moderately annoyed over the reasoning some women use for not having kids.  One of the biggest excuses I’ve heard is that they do not want to ruin their bodies.  I’m sure we all know a woman who has said this.

Now I don’t personally know this particular unnamed lady pictured below (minus her head—I don’t want sued!), but in a conversation a year or so ago, she stated adamantly that she would not be having kids because she didn’t "need a kid ruining" her body.

Seriously?  Seriously.

I’m a bigger guy myself, and I’m not poking fun at her size, but really, lady?  You think birthing a child will ruin your body, but the excess food you consume and your lack of exercise won’t?  She’s not even that big, apparently, and perhaps this picture isn’t all that flattering, but to say a child will ruin your body when you’re obviously carrying around quite a few extra pounds seems asinine to me.  And besides, let me just set the record straight by saying that watching my wife care for my sons is one of the SEXIEST things I’ve ever seen in my life.  Yes, she may have a few stretch marks and a few pounds to lose to get back to her pre-pregnancy weight, but if you are a woman who is concerned about changes to your body due to child birth, don’t be.

BTW, that lady above could quite possibly have some other issues unrelated to children.  I know I shouldn’t judge her, but she seems to have a narcissistic personality.  For example, her husband is a very effeminate man—so much so that many people have reportedly mistaken him for being gay.  I mean absolutely no disrespect by that, just to be clear.  But continuing on with my point, she also didn’t take her husband’s last name, even in hyphenated form.  Again, no disrespect there either.  But add it all up, including her comments regarding childbirth ruining her body, and it really tells you something about her, doesn’t it?  I mean, by all observations, it would seem that she’s simply a strong-willed, slightly masculine, career-oriented woman, and that’s totally cool.  But if that’s the case, lady, don’t tell mothers-to-be that you don’t want kids because “kids will ruin your body.”  Just say you don’t want kids because that’s the choice you’ve made.  End of discussion.

I’ve also heard women say that they can barely take care of themselves, let alone kids.  This one isn’t quite so annoying, as I’ve seen a lot of women out there who should definitely NOT be mothers, but shouldn’t that be a bit of a wakeup call for them?  If they can “BARELY take care of themselves,” shouldn’t they take some steps to get their personal lives in better order?  I don’t think I’ve ever been at a point in my adult life where I could “barely take care of myself.”  Yeah, maybe you shouldn’t be having kids, but maybe you should be getting busy doing other things like creating a better life for yourself.  Just a thought.

And finally, switching subjects completely again, I don’t understand why restaurants have to use so much sodium in their meals.  I’m sure I could Google it, and my inquiring mind probably will as soon as I’m done typing this, but if you eat out anywhere in a typical day, you are likely to get two times your recommended amount of sodium.  High sodium has been proven to contribute to high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, osteoporosis, and a number of other nasty, life threatening diseases.

I’ve been tweaking my diet the past few weeks, really trying to make a conscious effort to go from a bigger man to a, well, slightly-bigger-than-average-sized man.  I’ve been more active, trying to walk in place as often as I can and squeezing in twenty minutes or so of exercise every night.  I’ve cut out sugary sodas and have cut back tremendously on sweets.  I’ve been trying to keep my calories below 2000, and I’ve been fairly successful at that.  But, wow, my sodium levels haven’t budged.

We grab take-out probably three or four times per week for convenience.  We have always done this, and when my wife goes back to work, that trend will only continue.  We don’t get home until nearly six most nights, and by that time it takes entirely too long to make a complicated dinner.  I’ve been much more conscious of what I’m ordering on the menus of restaurants, but since I started tracking sodium, I’ve been at a total loss.  It's next to impossible to get a low-sodium meal from a restaurant.

Take, for example, Panera and their seemingly healthy food choices.  Last night I ordered a chopped Thai chicken salad, a cup of broccoli cheddar soup, and a French baguette.   Sounds like a healthy meal, right?  And really, it should have been.  In total it was 950 calories comprised of 101g of carbs, 39g of fat, and 54g of protein.  It even had 13g of fiber.  Great stuff…until I looked at the sodium content.  In all, the meal was 3080mg of sodium, the equivalent of one and a half tablespoons.  Yuck.

Aside from the above-mentioned health issues, sodium makes you retain water.  If you eat foods that, in total, contain the daily recommended allowance of sodium (typically 2500mg), you’ll be fine.  If you eat much more than that, the next time you hop on the scale you’ll find that you probably haven’t lost any weight—and quite possibly gained some.  That’s because your body is filled with water.

I looked up all of the ingredients to make the Panera meal I mentioned above, and the total sodium content I came up with was much, much less—closer to around 1200mg.  So why are they adding sodium to an otherwise healthy meal?  I’m sure it has something to do with preservatives or taste or whatnot, and I’ll be Googling it like I said, but it really makes me think that the healthy way to eat is to eat at home where you can measure out your own fresh ingredients and know EXACTLY what you are putting into the food you consume.

That’s all I have to rant about for now, I guess.  I feel better now.  Thanks for reading.

A World Without Money

Here’s a scenario for you: your daily life revolves completely around bettering yourself and those close to you.  You have no need for work, because money is non-existent.  The value we place on material possessions is completely absent from society, thereby making the idea of working for a paycheck obsolete.  You may still go to a “job”, but you do so in order to improve yourself in areas like education, experience, physical fitness, camaraderie, or any number of reasons other than fattening your now non-existent wallet.

I’m joking, right?

It’s hard to imagine a society where money doesn’t exist.  Really, if making more moolah wasn’t important, who would wait our tables and flip our burgers?  Who would stock the shelves of grocery stores?  Money is the deciding factor in everything.  People work to make money to buy things.

Fans of Star Trek will know that the futuristic societies portrayed in those stories have evolved past the use of money.  Their drive and ambition is, instead, to further themselves and achieve more.  The idea is altruistic and refreshing, yet for us it seems millennia away.

Not so fast.  Fans of Star Trek will also recognize the term “replicator”, which is a machine that can create food and supplies out of atoms and molecules.  A person walks up to the replicator, asks for a hot cup of coffee or a slice of pepperoni pizza, and voila it appears before them ready to eat.  Again, this is the stuff of science fiction…but really, it’s not.  It's modern science and engineering.

I’ve been hearing more and more about 3D printers making their way into the public eye.  These printers can manufacture three dimensional plastic objects out of specifications supplied by the user.  In other words, if I wanted a pen to write with, I could program the printer to create a plastic casing for a pen, and it would “print” that casing.  I’d still have to acquire the ink and ballpoint features, but the bulk of my object has been created for me.

Just last week I read an article about people building the casings of assault rifles using 3D printers.  On the popular television show The Big Bang Theory, Howard and Raj create action figures of themselves using a 3D printer.  These things do exist, and they are becoming more and more prevalent.

I’ll admit that building simple plastic pieces and models is a far cry from generating a steaming cup of tea from molecules, but some engineers have gotten a lot closer than those 3D printing machines available commercially.  Below is an interesting article from a few months ago summarizing the author’s friend and his attempts to construct a replicator in his lab.

http://betanews.com/2012/11/08/star-trek-replicator-is-closer-to-reality-than-you-think/

Interesting stuff.  Brings to mind the ideas I conjured up in my first novel, ProjectUtopia.

But where am I going with all of this?  Well, imagine being able to dispense food in seconds or even minutes from a machine in your home.  You would never need to go to the grocery store.  You could ask for ingredients like flour or turmeric or whatever to make your own dish, or you could just program the dish itself into the replicator.  Why ever go to a restaurant?  For the intimate, dining out experience?  Well, restaurants would have replicators as well.  You just punch in your order, it materializes on the table, and when you leave it recycles the remaining bits of food and even the dinnerware and utensils back into molecules and atoms that would be used for the next customer.

So if you are no longer paying for your food, what would you do with your money?  Buy new clothes?  Why not just replicate them as well?  Buy an 80 inch TV?  Replicate that.  Buy a car or a house?  No, just replicate them.

Suddenly the things we prize, those material possessions we all covet, are all suddenly worthless.  Your neighbor has a bigger house or a green lawn?  Replicate a new addition or new grass seed or whatever.  You want a fancy watch?  Replicate it.

We’d still need electricity and heat and utilities, right?  Well, if a replicator can create food and clothing and electronics, it surely could create photons, and it most certainly could generate energy.

So what would we do with ourselves if we had all of these things available to us at the push of a button?  I’m sure some of us would become incredibly lazy, but I also think a bit of Darwinism would set in.  Most people couldn't just sit around doing nothing forever.  Humans like to compete with one another, it’s ingrained in our DNA, and so you’d see a lot more sports and creativity in the world.  In other words, most of us would strive toward improving our minds and our bodies.

Yes, there'd still be work to do, but eventually work would become more like a hobby.  Doctors would still be necessary, but the idea of paying them with money would be silly because they could just replicate everything they'd ever need.  So why would anyone even go to medical school, you might ask?  For the challenge.  To better oneself.  To help others.

And I'm sure there would still be some mundane jobs like plowing snow or cleaning public places, but people would do those things for camaraderie.  And nobody likes messes.  Yes, you'd probably have people who would shun the new system and intentionally cause problems, but if everyone is striving to be smarter or stronger or whatever the case may be, I think you'd see a lot less crime.

I know, I know, this all seems like the far-fetched ramblings of a sci-fi geek.  And I’d agree with you, except that replicators are practically available now.  Primitive, yes, but look at the ENIAC when it was first built in the 40’s.  It took up an entire building and was a fraction of a tiny percentage as powerful as the cell phone in your pocket right now.  So just imagine where our replicators will be in 70 years?

A world without money?  It won't happen overnight, but the possibilities of it happening a few generations from now aren't quite as absurd as you might think.

Get Yourself a Cow-Catcher

Anyone who writes knows that it’s entirely too easy to find yourself off-track.  I’m not just talking about digressions within a story-line but even putting pen to paper or fingers to keyboard.  Distractions of all sorts surround us, and more often than not our best intentions have not been met because we’ve become sidetracked.

When a sketch artist sits down to draw, he or she will have his paper, pencils and charcoal and shading tools and erasers, proper lighting, etc.  No sketch artist who loves his work will walk over to his drawing, sketch in five or six lines, and then get up to go do something else.  Or even sketch in a few lines and then just sit there thinking about a grocery list or a project at work.  He’ll devote at least thirty minutes of uninterrupted sketching to complete at least a portion of his work.

Writers, or at least the ones I know, tend to be different.  While the overall product of writers and sketchers is similar, i.e. something has been created from nothing, writers must rely on their thoughts and ideas and memories to create.  Most sketchers will have at least a model of some sort to work from, either a photograph or an object like a bowl of fruit.  And therein lies the problem with writers.  Taking what you see and drawing a complex copy of it requires some skill, but what you see will usually never deviate much or at all during the course of a sketch.  Our thoughts, however, are never in a fixed, static state, and thus our writing and direction and focus can constantly change.

I mean no disrespect to people who sketch or paint, by the way.  I love to sketch myself, and yet I’ve always found the art elusive.  A wrong angle here or a line that’s become too long there can totally throw off the finished product, and thus drawing requires a ton of patience and a keen eye that few of us possess.

Yet my point with writing is that our models are constantly shifting.  Add in life, that is,  the time we spend doing things like work, spending time with family, running errands, etc., and our best ideas can often be lost or forgotten.  And thus some of our most compelling thoughts are never written down.

I keep telling myself, “Ryan, you need to get yourself a cow-catcher.”  What I mean by that is that I need to be able to push things aside to pursue my passion and dreams.  I first need to move out all the daily crap I deal with and allot myself the time to sit and write, rather than jotting down a few paragraphs every so often when I have a minute here or there.

And I’m not alone.  Anyone can find a free half hour in a week to set aside for accomplishing something.  I was informed of an incident a while back at a company where a boss, during the final quarter of a year when schedules were hectic, stated that year that nobody had time until the first quarter to do an important hour-long training (that had been annually conducted in the fourth quarter for numerous years prior).  That was 62 business days to work with, or 465 hours, and nobody had one hour (0.2% of the total time) to spare.  Really?  Really??  Seems a bit ludicrous to me, especially when daily people could be seen standing in the halls and chatting about personal stuff or sending emails to friends or even surfing the web for a few minutes.

Anyone who uses the excuse that he/she doesn’t have a half hour or an hour to spare in a week is kidding him/herself.  If you are telling yourself that you don’t have an hour, it sounds like you need to take a step back from your life and make some assessments about how you manage your time.  If you are a workaholic, does that project that is due three months from now really require twelve hours a day from you—in other words, you can’t even spare an hour?  If not, you’re probably overworked or need far better time management skills (and possibly even psychiatric help).  If you watch TV, can’t you pick your least favorite of your favorite shows and stop watching it—or else record the season on your DVR and watch it in the summer when reruns abound? (And if you are that glued to your TV, you may need psychiatric help as well!)  If you are a stay-at-home mom, can’t you run a load of laundry and start dinner at the same time, or maybe even get your kids to help you with mixing or stirring or setting the table?  We ALL can find an hour a week, and probably a whole lot more if we really try.

So once you find the time to write (or exercise or learn to play a musical instrument or whatever it is you are passionate about), the next step is to push aside all of the chaos swirling around in your head and focus.  One of the best ways I know to do this is to deep breathe or meditate.  Inhale 5 seconds through your nose, hold for two seconds, then exhale 5 seconds out your mouth.  Count the seconds, focus only on your breathing, and do this for five or ten minutes.  At the end of that brief time, you’ll find yourself relaxed and hopefully focused enough to begin work.  I’ve been trying to do this any time I’m about to start on something that requires a lot of thought, and I’m always surprised at how well it works.  Picture a math professor’s whiteboard filled with all the formulas from the previous lecture, and imagine if he tried to cram in new equations for your class.  You wouldn’t want that, would you?  No, you’d want a clean slate.  It’s the same principle.

And then, when your mind is free, just write.  Sounds easy enough, but I always get caught up in re-reading my last chapter and editing.  Then when I get to the bottom and should start writing new material, I want to take a break because I’m mentally fatigued from all the editing I just did.  Or else I only have twenty minutes left of the time I’ve allotted myself, and so I make the excuse that I can’t write anything meaningful in twenty minutes.  “Get yourself a cow-catcher, Ryan.”  Push that perfectionist out of the way, forget about re-reading and editing, familiarize yourself with where you left off, and then JUST WRITE.  When I manage to do that, it’s usually at that point that the words start to flow, and before long I’ll have completed a whole chapter.

But there are other obstacles that may be in my way.  I’m fortunate enough through my IT work to have developed some quick fingers.  I’ve seen and heard and read of other writers who struggle with typing.  If you can’t type, and you like to write, ditch the keyboard and pick up a pen.  Someone who types 25 words per minute will ultimately lose their ideas and thoughts because they are spending too long trying to get them out.  And if writing won’t work, get some speech recognition software like Dragon Naturally Speaking and dictate your thoughts.  It’s akin to someone who loves to exercise but has bad knees or bunions.  You can still exercise, but running may not be the best way to do it.  You can work to improve on physical or mental or emotional limitations, but don’t let them become roadblocks to your accomplishments.

We all have obstacles that prevent us from achieving greatness, like cows standing on the railroad tracks.  So get yourself a cow-catcher, push those obstacles clear of your path, and accomplish something that makes you proud!

An Argument for Federal Paid Time Off Laws

Ask people from other countries what they think of a typical American, and I’m certain you’ll hear a few responses saying that we are lazy.  And it’s difficult to argue against the viewpoint.  With 35% of the American population obese, our nation far outranks all others.  And people who are obese are lazy.

But wait one second.  That last sentence there isn’t all that accurate.  It’s hard to argue the definition of obesity, but laziness is something else entirely.  When I picture a lazy person, I visualize some guy sitting on a couch, his pot-belly hanging out under his shirt, munching on Cheetos and drinking Mountain Dew and watching one television show after another that he’s recorded on his DVR (this may or may not describe me…….).  But I also picture this guy doing this all day, non-stop.  During evenings.  On weekends.  Pretty much any time he’s not working, this is what he’s doing.  So that’s definitely not me.  I enjoy television, and I’ve been known to sit and watch a few hours at a time, but rarely do I get the chance to do that!

Yes, sitting on a couch all day will make a person obese, but just sitting in general will as well.  And for the millions of office workers in the U.S., our jobs are partially (maybe mostly) to blame for our big butts.  Read a few of my earlier posts for more evidence toward that.  It’s very VERY difficult to be active when you are glued to a chair and a computer screen for eight hours a day.

Yet ask any office worker—or any worker for that matter—in America about taking time off to take care of themselves, and they’ll say it’s simply not possible.  I read an article about a new strain of norovirus (stomach flu) that is making its way around the U.S.  This part is a bit gross, but it is spread through fecal matter, and people who aren’t washing their hands thoroughly after using the restroom are contributing to its propagation.  Food workers, in particular, are tossing fuel on the fire because they may be ill, can’t take the time off to recover because most of them don’t have ANY paid time off, and thus are spreading these germs into the food that we eat.  Yum!  You can read more about it here: http://vitals.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/01/28/16739631-norovirus-why-washing-your-hands-isnt-enough?lite

Here are some stunning facts on America’s PTO and vacation policies (source http://modernservantleader.com/servant-leadership/americas-struggle-with-vacation-and-paid-time-off/ --author of the article cited CNN):

America vs. Other Country Vacation Standards
America trails other countries when it comes to vacation.  The facts speak for themselves (source, CNN.com):
- Only 57% of U.S. employees use their entire allotted vacation time (Reuters/Ipsos)
- U.S. Employers are not obligated under any federal law to provide paid vacations
- More than 2 dozen industrialized countries require employers to offer 4 or more weeks of vacation (2009, Mercer)
- Finland, Brazil, and France guarantee employees 6 weeks of vacation
- Approximately 25% of U.S. workers do not have access to any paid vacation

So in other words, one could argue that we are working ourselves to death.  We get sick, we go to work.  We have a baby, our mothers go back to work when the child is only a month or two old, and our fathers are lucky to have any time off at all.  And even when we do have time off, we STILL work.  I was off for a week last week, and yet I still logged a half a dozen hours of work.  On days that I take PTO, I find myself checking my emails every half hour or so on my phone, and often times I’m finding myself remotely connecting to the office to take care of one task or another.  Some bosses even frown upon workers who use PTO, so much so that many are afraid to use all of their vacation days.  Doing so can be seen as a sign of weakness, of laziness, and even disloyalty to an employer.  And at best, workers who don’t use all of their PTO days wear it proudly like a badge.  “Oh yeah.  Look at me.  I only took off three days last year.”  The notion is just silly, is it not?

We have created a culture in America where we can’t relax, recuperate, or recover.

What else causes obesity, aside from inactivity and overeating?  Stress.  What increases the risk of chronic heart disease?  Stress.  What can lead to hair loss and/or gray or white hair? Stress.  And what causes stress?  Working too much.

Don’t get me wrong.  I enjoy working.  There are times when I need to exercise my brain, and I do that every day while on the job.  But there are times when I need to exercise my body, and there are times when I need to allow both my brain and my body to relax and recover, and those times are rapidly diminishing in our American society.

Was Einstein an Alien?

In Back to the Future Part II, Doc Brown illustrates to Marty how his nemesis, Biff Tannen, used the DeLorean to travel back in time in order to change his life.  Biff gave the 1955 version of himself a sports almanac from the future and instructed him to bet on all the winning teams, thereby changing history and making himself wealthy.  The history that Doc Brown and Marty knew leading up to 1985 had thus been changed, and therefore they had to return to 1955 and stop future Biff from giving the almanac to his teenage counterpart.

If you’ve read my book, Paradox, you’ll notice some similarities.  I love time travel and the Back to the Future movies.  Sure, there are some glaring plot holes in Back to the Future—like the fact that Marty’s mother, Lorraine, falls in love with him in 1955, and that alone should have immediately eradicated Marty from existence—but we love fictional works on time travel because it’s such a mysterious and wildly speculative subject.  It’s something we’ll probably never achieve, because if we will, wouldn’t we be meeting all sorts of time travelling fellows from the future?

Perhaps we already have though.  While waiting for my wife at one of her appointments this morning, I was reading about how a recent experiment supports Einstein’s theory of a cosmological constant.  Scientists studied alcohol molecules from a galaxy 7 billion light-years away (don’t ask me how—still scratching my head on that one), but they discovered that the mass of protons and electrons were pretty much the same as they are on Earth.  Because the galaxy observed is 7 billion light years away, that means that the measurements taken come from a time 7 billion years ago (the time it took light to travel from there to here), and thus the mass has remained unchanged for over half the life of the universe (estimated at 13.7 billion years old).  The article went on to talk about dark energy and the implications of Einstein’s theory, but what I took from it was that Einstein was one heck of a smart dude to theorize all of this stuff and have it confirmed time and again.

Although here’s something I bet you didn’t know: Albert Einstein was NOT the smartest man in history.  His brain was collected prior to his cremation by a pathologist who then studied it along with numerous others.  The Sylvian fissure separating his parietal lobe was tiny, thereby making the feature approximately 15% larger than average.  The parietal lobe is responsible for visualizing in three-dimensions, spatial recognition, and, naturally, mathematics.

Einstein never took an IQ test, but his IQ is thought to have been around the neighborhood of 160.  That’s very high by most standards and comparable to another great scientist, Stephen Hawking, but there are plenty of others who are known to have IQs as high and even higher.  Dolph Lungren, yes the actor who will “break you”, has an IQ of 160.  The actor James Woods has an IQ of 180.  Jimmy Carter, Sharon Stone, Quentin Tarantino, and even adult film actress Asia Carrera are all known to have very high IQs.  And none—NONE—of those people have contributed to the human race like Albert Einstein.

Any Star Trek fan knows about the Prime Directive.  It basically states that the United Federation of Planets can have no interference in the development of an alien civilization.  And that sounds great and all, but seriously, that would likely never happen.  If we ever found another alien life-form or even civilization, you bet your bananas that we’d be trying to communicate with them, contact them, sending probes and cameras and postcards and episodes of I Love Lucy and whatnot to them.  And if they were technologically advanced enough, they’d probably be doing the same back.  For all we know, we could have Mars rover-like probes all over our planet already!

So for Albert Einstein, whose estimated intelligence wasn’t anything super-special, it’s certainly plausible that this guy was either from the future or from a distant alien race.  Both could explain the anomaly in his parietal lobe.  Both could explain how his theories keep holding up time and again—which is impressive considering all the work that has been done to prove him wrong.  Perhaps he was sent back from a future generation in an effort to speed up our scientific discoveries and whatnot.  We always say to ourselves, “I wish I knew then what I know now.”  Wouldn’t it be great to be blessed as a teenager with the knowledge we have in our thirties or forties or eighties?  Maybe that was his role—to travel back and “propose” theories that future generations know in fact to be true.  And if that's the case, and if he was just a messenger, maybe his intelligence is/was just average compared to the rest of his kind.  Wouldn’t that just be crazy?

Or maybe he was an alien, sent to Earth to gently push us along in our plight for answers to the universe and meaning of life.  You know, kinda like (illegally) teaching your kids how to drive when they are twelve so that they ace it when they turn sixteen.  My dad did that for me--mostly so that I could drive our car back to our wood shed to load up wood into the trunk in the winter so that he didn't have to--but I was well-versed in driving by the time I was old enough to do it legally.

If Albert Einstein was a time traveler or alien, perhaps he's even still somehow alive--smiling in on us from whatever dimension or planet or future he's residing in now.  If that's the case, thanks for all the theories!  Oh yeah, and live long and prosper!

Baby Watch

Well, my wife is due with our second child in a matter of days, and the baby watch is on.  The crib is set up, the new and hand-me-down clothes have all been washed in Dreft, boxes of diapers are standing by, packages of bottles are at the ready.  And here we are, just waiting.  And waiting.  And waiting.

With my first-born, things were a bit different.  We were sleeping one night, nine days before her due date, and at one point my wife got up to go to the bathroom.  She came back, snapped the light on, and said to me, “I think my water broke.”  She then called the doctor while I went to use the restroom (having no clue when I’d get the chance to go again), and so at 2:30 AM we made the drive to the hospital.  We arrived without much ado, made our way to the baby floor, and were given our room.  Her pain gradually became worse, and after an hour or so we ordered an epidural.  An anesthesiologist came and administered it to her (although he was rather rude about it—luckily he was in and out and never to be seen again), and from that point on it was rather smooth sailing.  Baby Adam was born at about 10 til 10 AM, a 9 lb 2 oz monster with a full head of black hair.  I’ll never forget that moment in my life (I’m sure no father would), but as I put my finger down to his tiny little hand while he rested under the heat lamp, he grasped my finger.  Such a proud moment for any Pappa.  Anyway, we were out of the hospital within two days, and other than needing a bilirubin blanket for a few nights that first week, that was it.  Easy peasy.

Now with child number two, we are waiting.  I guess we just assumed that this little guy would come early like his big brother, but he seems content hanging out in Mommy’s womb.  She’s showing no signs of giving birth any time soon, and we suspect that her doctor will discuss inducing labor at her next OB/GYN appointment.

As an IT guy, I see having a baby somewhat like having a good disaster recovery plan.  I have lists and processes and procedures all mapped out for that impending moment.  I’ve initiated several steps, including having my sister on stand-by to pick up our eldest son from school if need be, having bags packed and ALREADY IN THE CAR, etc.  But things never quite go as planned, or else you can never really be one hundred percent prepared for everything.  Just as long as we’re not having a baby on the side of the road, or in the elevator on the way up to the baby floor…

But as you can imagine, I don’t have much time to write or blog right now.  So please pardon me if my posts become sparse over the next week or two.  As soon as we can get back into an established routine, I’ll get back to giving you all a piece of my mind on a regular basis!

Not Down with the Sickness

Wow, it seems that nasty germs have been infecting anywhere and everywhere these past two weeks.  It’s as if all the stress of the holidays finally decided to take their toll on the immune systems of the masses.  Numerous people at my workplace have been out due to illness.  My son’s daycare/preschool had 6 kids out.  Luckily I have been spared, for the most part.  My son and mother though have not.

My mother actually got sick before the holidays, and luckily she has since recovered.  It was a nasty little virus that caused her to cough and wheeze for weeks though.

My little man seems to have acquired the flu.  I read that the flu shot, which he got 4-6 weeks ago, only covered 90% of the strains this year, and I really think he ended up with one that was in that 10%.  It began Saturday night with a high fever, chills, complaints of pain in his tummy and mouth (throat).  The doctor said our little monkey didn’t show signs of an ear infection, and he tested negative for strep.  The doctor was fairly certain a virus was at fault.  He didn’t actually say it was the flu, but I can’t imagine any other virus causing this much havoc.

As a parent, seeing your kids in pain is one of the worst things to experience.  Your child is like a mini little extension of you—one that needs to be nurtured and cared for and educated so that he or she may some day turn out, hopefully, twice the man or woman that you  are.  You literally will do anything and everything for your kids.  But when they are sick, it’s one of the most helpless feelings in the world.

For the past four days we’ve had to administer acetaminophen and ibuprofen to keep his fever at bay, alternating back and forth.  These two drugs are like a half a can of Pepsi or Coke compared to a triple espresso or two cans of Red Bull.  The acetaminophen does work, but it takes about an hour to kick in and lasts only a few hours.  The ibuprofen kicks in within 15-20 minutes, and he would go about 5 hours before his fever came roaring back.  Unfortunately you can’t give ibuprofen over and over, I’m assuming due to side effects.

When the medicine wears off, my son goes from a happy, go-lucky kid to being ultra-sensitive and super clingy.  He’s getting too big to pick up and carry around, yet that’s all he wants.  If you tease him or try to make him laugh, he bursts into tears.  He’s incredibly uncomfortable, and man does it just tug at your heart-strings.  I’d gladly trade with him and take the virus from him if it were possible, because seeing him that way is just awful.

He is doing better now.  He even made it through a full day of school.  Some little guys and girls aren’t quite so lucky.  A coworker’s one grandchild has been down for two weeks with this fever-causing bug.  I can’t imagine!

But as easily susceptible as we are to tiny bacteria and viruses, we really are strong creatures.  Unless we are older or very young or our immune systems are out of whack, our bodies seem to overcome the invasion and we get better.  We heal and live on to fight another day.

And for those of us who aren’t sick, we always try to help out the others, don’t we?  I personally think caring for each other is an innate behavioral response.  Some choose to ignore it, sure, but most of us will lend a hand or care for those who are sick or hurting.  Look at the public responses to Katrina and Haiti and Sandy, and you can see that people REALLY DO CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER.

Sometimes our world seems full of doom and gloom.  But for all the mass shootings and war crimes and terrorism and everything else we hear about in the news every day, there are hundreds of millions more acts of kindness and bravery that go unnoticed.  Doctors are treating sick children in impoverished states.  Firefighters and police officers and Armed Services members are putting their lives on the line every day to save lives and help those in need.  Sometimes it seems that there’s an awful lot of hate in the world, but maybe that’s because we all just haven’t opened our eyes wide enough to notice and appreciate the good.

Overstepping

So a teenager is driving along with his adult father in the passenger seat and two teenage siblings in the back seat.  He hears his cell phone chime, indicating that he has a new text message, and takes his eyes off the road to check it.  He has done this before and is rather careless behind the wheel--something his father probably knew about already, only this time he T-bones a van occupied by six people.  All six are injured, a few critically, but all will make a full physical recovery.  Emotional and mental scars may last forever, but they all lived.  Lucky for the teenager.

He’s arrested and charged, and the judge suspends his driving privileges for a period of 15 years.  Prosecutors want the adult father charged as well, and the police and prosecutors and entire judicial system goes back and forth on whether or not the father has committed a crime.  The father claimed he had no idea why his son reached for the cell phone—he hadn’t even heard the text message—and so why should he be at fault?  Prosecutors still push, and he is ultimately arrested and charged with negligence and is awaiting trial.

Several months after all this happens (but prior to the father being convicted of any wrongdoing), the father gets a letter from his insurance company.  The letter barely mentions the teenage driver, and instead states that the father and his two other children who were merely passengers in the car will now be forced to pay $20,000 per year, and that this is a mandatory fee.  They will also never be permitted to own cell phones, will always have to drive with both hands on the steering wheel, must only drive lime green 1994 Geo Metros for a period of four years, as well as several other unreasonable mandates.  Failure to do so will result in a complete and total ban of insurance by both the insurance company and any other insurers.  In other words, if they don’t comply, they can all kiss their driving privileges goodbye.

The father has money, and he knows that if he fights the insurance company and loses, his children will suffer.  Trying to minimize damages, he pays the fee and buys lime green 1994 Geo Metros for his two other technologically-deprived teenage children.

Yeah, this would never happen.  It’s just too bizarre, right?  Not for Penn State students, faculty, and alumni.  I don’t care much for Pennsylvania Governor Tom Corbett and his politics, but his reasons for filing a lawsuit against the NCAA seem sound to me.

My Blog Year in Review

So 2012 is no longer.  It seemed to fly by in our household.  It was also a year filled with a lot of tragedy on the national level and also right in my back yard (Geeseytown is about 7 miles from my house).  I was listening to the year in review on the radio, and the number of mass shootings and Superstorm Sandy and all of the lost lives was tough to listen to.  I’m an optimist, a dreamer, a person who sees the glass half full, drinks it, and then fills it back up.  Let’s hope 2013 is a happier, healthier, safer year for everyone.

But looking back at a microcosm of 2012, my blog, I just have a few observations to share.  I came in just a hair below 3000 hits over the course of the year, although I have no statistics from when I switched from WordPress to Blogger, so I’m sure it was quite a bit more.  Not bad for some unknown, shaggy-bearded guy from the middle of Nowhere, Pennsylvania (that’s Altoona, Pennsylvania, by the way, and no I’m not saying I dislike the city—I obviously like it enough to keep living here—just that few people outside of Pennsylvania have ever even heard of it).  But yeah, people actually are paying attention to what I have to say, and for those of you who do, THANK YOU!

I have to chuckle at the most popular posts from my blog.  Overwhelmingly landing at number one was my post on the PSU scandal—I think less about the content and mostly because people liked the PSU emblem I included in the post.  The second one, which has me just shaking my head, is the post regarding why people hate Leann Rimes.  In that post I dissected how people were too obsessed with celebrities, and the fact that dozens upon dozens of people read that post is proof enough.  More on that in a second.  Third was a post on people who love drama, fourth was my post last month on weight loss, and fifth was a post on weird bodily stuff that included a snippet on bangs covering one eye being the cause of a lazy eye (this rumor must have a lot of teens and twenty-somethings worried for it to be clicked on so much!)  The one post I thought would have garnered the most attention, labeled “I Won the Powerball!!!!”, came in eighth—just behind “What Happened to Colored Toilet Paper.”  That’s a bit comforting to know that people care about beige and blue toilet paper just about as much as me winning hundreds of millions of dollars in the lottery (which I did NOT, by the way, in case you didn’t read that post).

My blog stats also include lists of keywords that people used to find my blog.  The top key words were “penn state”, so that’s not surprising.  Next was my actual URL: rastrohman.blogspot.com.  Amazingly, four of the remaining eight related to Leann Rimes: "why do people hate leann rimes", "hate leann rimes", "I hate leann rimes", "lean rimes hated".  By this logic, if I (or any other blogger) just included the most hated celebrity names in their post titles, we’d have some rather successful (albeit shameful) blogs.  I guess people still hate Leann Rimes though.  Seriously read that post (dated August 1, 2012)!

Another surprising stat was the audience.  I had readers from 10 different countries and every state in the U.S., but I was a little shocked to see that Firefox was the top browser used (32%).  IE came in second at 25%, Chrome—what I use—came in third at 17%, Safari fourth at 12%, and Opera fifth at 6%.  Of the operating systems, Windows was the top at 68%, Mac second at 11%, iOS third at 8%, Linux fourth at 5%, and Android fifth at 2%.  Somehow I guess I imagined iOS and Android being higher up there, but I guess people are still using desktop computers and laptops more than I had suspected.

I didn’t make much money from my blog, but that’s not really why I’m doing it.  Still, I pulled in $3.04 since June.  If you want to add to my piggy bank, feel free to click on the ad links on the side.  Even if you close the page immediately after clicking on the links, each click gives me some extra pennies that I’ll then end up spending in Toys R Us on my two boys.

Finally, and the main reason I blog, my 2012 novel Terminal Restraint had 37 page views since I posted the page in early October.  I’ve had slightly more downloads and previews, but I just have to say that this was my best novel to date, and people are taking notice.  It’s not too scary and not vulgar at all, but it does touch upon some taboo subjects.  It’s a great story though, so if you haven’t checked it out yet, please do so!

That's it for 2012!  I'll keep on entertaining in 2013!

To New Beginnings

I always give myself resolutions for the New Year, and I never stick to them.  If I had, I’d probably be slim, rich, a well-known author of twenty published novels, have three or four degrees and numerous certifications, etc.  Yeah, maybe I’m giving myself too much to do.  Instead of reaching for all the stars, maybe I should be reaching for just one.  Or maybe I shouldn’t be reaching for the stars at all.  Maybe I should be reaching for the entire galaxy.

My problem is that I can’t decide on just one area I need to improve.  I know that if I really focused on just one thing, like my writing for example, I could pound out two or three books in a year.  But darnnit if life doesn’t get in the way, and then I’m spending time exercising or reading up on news or tinkering with a new gadget or wondrous piece of technology and my books sit on my digital shelf gathering digital dust.  And the next thing I know, my resolution is lost or at the very least muddled, and then I’m scrambling to get it back on track, and then by June or July I’ve given up on it entirely.

This year I think I’m going to simply focus on being a better person.  I know it may sound like a bit of a cop out, but hear me out.  Rather than just focusing on every little goal, I’m going to set one big umbrella-like goal for myself: improve on the person I’ve become.

How should I go about doing that?  Well, I’d already say I’m a pretty good father, but in a few weeks I’ll be a father twice over when we welcome our second son to the world.  Will I be as successful raising two boys as I have so far raising one?  Challenges await me, I’m well aware, but that’s one area of how I intend to become a better person.

Will I lose a bunch of weight?  Hopefully, but that’s not really what I’m focusing on.  Eating healthier, being more active, drinking more water, etc.—all of these things will contribute to weight loss, and if I’m better at all of them, I should see a difference.

What about my writing?  Well, I’ve realized over the past year with my blog and my novels that I tend to write too much.  I write and write and write and then spend eons rewriting and editing.  Look at some of my previous blog posts, and you can only imagine the time I spent on them.  So don’t be surprised if these posts become much shorter.

I think it’s a good resolution.  Be a better person.  No more crankiness when I’m sick or driving or stressed.  Just be a better person.  Hopefully this one will last.  Hopefully.

Liquefy Yourself!

I’m making good progress with my lifestyle changes.  So far my weight is down two percent in the last couple of weeks, and I’ve noticed some increased energy.  My legs are a little sore from all of the walking, but no pain no gain, right?

One thing I did not mention from my weight-loss post two weeks or so ago was the importance of staying hydrated.  This really seems like an elementary school concept, one that most people would smack their heads and loudly proclaim “Duh!” over, but it has always been a huge problem for me.  I guess I just figured I was getting enough fluids in my body through the things that I drank, and that the 8 cups of water thing was vastly overrated.  I also always thought that 8 cups of water meant 8 cups of liquid, and I was surely getting that.

Again, I’m no expert in this, but I think that if you are drinking soda and juice and other beverages in lieu of your 8 cups of water, you might be hijacking your weight-loss goals.  Aside from all the calories and sugar you are consuming, beverages containing caffeine may just be flushing all the fluids straight back out of you (too many trips to the bathroom, maybe?)  While some diuretics are good, especially for ailments like high blood pressure, flushing the fluids back out of your body at an elevated rate seems, at least to me, to be the same as not even drinking them in the first place.  Yes, you may be flushing sodium and things that aren’t healthy for you, but your body is roughly 60% water, so flushing out excessively by drinking beverages that are diuretics doesn’t sound like the healthiest thing to me.  I could be wrong on that one, but it makes sense, right?

Even just looking at it from a layman's perspective, drinking other fluids in place of water doesn’t make much sense.  You don’t wash your clothes or dishes with soda or juice, do you?  You wash it with water, because water is (hopefully) clean.  You clean your floors with water.  You wash your car with water.  Water is pure and has zero calories.  And if you try to argue that diet sodas have zero calories, try mopping your floor with a can of diet soda and see how clean it feels afterwards.  Eww.

Water is great at deception, because when you drink it, it tricks your tummy into thinking you’ve eaten something.  Drink two cups of water a half hour before a meal, and you’re probably going to want to eat a little less than normal.  Do it for all of your meals, and you’re probably going to end up quite a few calories shy of your normal dietary intake.

Water has other benefits too, like keeping your skin looking good and healthy, keeping you regular, etc.  Seems like a no-brainer to drink it.  But here’s where I and lots of others get stuck.  I remember my dad once saying, “I’m not going to drink water.  That’s all I had to drink when I was younger, and so now I’ll drink whatever I want.”  It’s a very common perspective.  Water is so ho-hum.  It doesn’t taste like anything.  You’d naturally rather drink something with flavor.  Well, you could always get the flavored waters or packets to add to your water, but I always found them to taste like weak Kool Aid--no doubt because all of the sugary soft drinks and fruit drinks I've had my entire life have messed up my palate.  And adding those flavor packets to your water 8 times a day can be expensive and a hassle, and it’s not something that someone who is struggling with their weight may be able to do consistently.

Here’s what I’ve trained myself to do.  In the morning, I’ll get up, and the first thing I do is get a 16 ounce glass of it and gulp it down.  By doing that, I’m already a quarter of the way to my 8 cup goal.  Oh yeah!  *said like the Kool Aid man*  It also helps when your water is cold, so if you don’t have a water cooler, put some tap water in a pitcher and keep it in the refrigerator.  Ice cold water, at least for me, goes down so much more easily than cool or luke-warm water does.

I have a 24-ounce plastic cup with a plastic straw that I keep in the office with me.  As soon as I get to work, I fill that up and try to have it empty by lunch.  I don’t really sip at it, though.  I’ve tried that, and it always seems like I have way too much left with 10 minutes to go before noon.  Instead I’ll chug about a third of it every hour or so.  That’s a cup an hour, and so typically by the time I’m done with work, I’ll have had my 8 cups.  Easy peasy.

If you are following along with me in trying to make some lifestyle changes, here’s a good assignment for you.  Get a measuring cup and some clear glasses, and measure yourself out 8 cups of water.  Then look at what you have.  That’s what is recommended that you drink each day.  Most of us will probably be surprised by that amount.  But when you start to develop a routine of drinking it more often, you won’t even think about it.  It will just become a natural part of your life.

And if you’re a heavy soda drinker like I am (was), perhaps it will even curb your appetite for those types of beverages.  After all, it’s hard to drink a can of soda when your belly is so full of water!

P.S.  This will most likely be my last post until the New Year.  Like everyone else, the next two weeks are going to be busy busy busy with the typical end-of-the-year merriment.  So happy holidays, and enjoy the time you have with your loved ones!

America's Tragedy - A Commentary on Mass Shootings

I’ve been thinking long and hard over the weekend regarding my words over the tragedy of Newtown, CT.  I think any parent would say that those children are our children, the nation's children, and while very few of us can know what it feels like to be their parents, our hearts ache for them.  This tragedy rips open a wound in our country so large that the scar will be there forever and may never heal.

Last night President Obama spoke at the memorial service in Newtown.  His words were strong, and his message was clear.  With this being his fourth memorial service for mass shooting victims, it is time that this country take a stand.  This cannot continue.

And yet I read of five other similar incidents that occurred over the weekend.  In Indiana, a man with 47 guns threatened to go to a nearby elementary school and kill more children.  In Oklahoma, a student was arrested, luckily, after planning to bomb and shoot kids in his school on the very same day as the Newtown massacre.  In Kansas, two police officers were shot and killed outside of a grocery store.  In Chicago, a city long known for horrible gun violence, two people died and 15 more were wounded in separate incidents across the city.  In California, 50 shots were fired outside of a mall.  I’m sure there were probably more incidents like these.  All of these reports came after we lost 20 beautiful angels.

What is wrong with us???

America has a real problem.  It’s not taxes on the wealthy.  It’s not unemployment.  Despite those problems currently being addressed by our nation’s government, raising tax rates on the rich folks is not going to prevent innocent people—CHILDREN—from losing their precious lives.  Action must be taken to stop this.

So what needs to be done?  Well first, I look at all of these suspects and assailants, and I notice a common theme in them.  James Holmes, Adam Lanza, Dylan Klebold, Eric Harris, Jared Loughner, Seung-Hui Cho.  All males in their late teens to early twenties.  Mostly white.  The correlations between the mass-killing violence and sex and age of the perpetrators, at the very least, can’t be denied.

Today I watched as some guy in his early twenties cut me and three others off on my eight-minute drive to work.  He then had stopped in a left turning lane, and as I drove past him and looked over, he had this blank stare on his face.  He didn’t care about anyone or anything else—just getting where he had to go.  And the other day as I was walking into a convenience store, a twenty-something guy opened the door right in front of me just enough so that he could enter, making me lunge for it instead of holding it open for me.  He was in his own little world, unobservant and/or completely apathetic to the people around him.  Desensitized and uncaring.  Two minor annoyances in the grand scheme of things, but a common theme nonetheless.

This morning I saw something that completely horrified me.  I must warn you, the language here is  incredibly graphic: http://deadspin.com/5968935/take-that-nigger-off-the-tv-we-wanna-watch-football-idiots-respond-to-nbc-pre+empting-sunday-night-football.  As I sat, tears welling up at the corners of my eyes as President Obama spoke at the memorial last evening, these insolent people not only were upset about NBC’s choice of programming (something I can’t even fathom) but actually had the wherewithal to go online and rant about it with such vulgar words.

What is wrong with us??

In examining the demographics of the perpetrators of these mass killings, we’re looking at somewhere between 5-10% of our population by age and race.  Most of these perpetrators have had mental or psychological issues.    Add in the warning signs and red flags, and we can probably narrow it down to fractions of a percent.  So if we say 0.5%, we’re talking about 1.5 million people.  That’s an average of 30,000 per state, or a little less than 500 per county.  I’m speaking in averages here, so some may be many more and others may be many less, but 500 per county doesn’t seem like an awful lot of people to keep track of.  It would at least provide us with a good starting point.

I think the first step has to be identification and intervention.  These people are deeply troubled individuals, and we need to figure out what’s going on inside their heads.  I was reading this article today, http://www.today.com/moms/i-am-adam-lanzas-mother-another-moms-cry-help-1C7625059, and my heart goes out to this woman.  Obviously her son is one of the ones I’d include.  But we can’t just round them all up and lock them up.  We need to get them the professional mental health treatment they need.  And unfortunately that may be a lot easier said than done.  But it’s a first step, and even if it stopped one massacre, wouldn’t it be worth it?

I’ve read that a couple of celebrities (one apparently now a hoax) came out and commented that God has been taken out of our schools, and that if we had more religion, we’d see less of these situations.  That’s another point that is hard to argue.  I’m not a very religious person myself, but I did have parents who taught me strong morals and ethics.  I was permitted to watch R-rated movies when I was young, but I was not desensitized to the violence.  My mother explained to me that these movies were fiction and that the motives of the villains were unethical and evil.  I learned the difference between right and wrong, and that’s what is important.  I think far too many of us today, especially the younger generations, are not being taught or are not comprehending such a basic idea.  It is morally and spiritually and reprehensibly wrong to hurt or take the life of another individual.

We need to have better security in the places where people gather.  That would primarily include schools and churches, but places like malls, movie theaters, and workplaces where hundreds or thousands of people come together need to be better protected.  Buildings that have more than, say, 100 occupants should be required to have at least one trained security person—someone who is fit enough mentally, physically, and emotionally to handle and hopefully prevent a situation like Aurora or Newtown or Tucson from ever occurring.  I also think everyone over the age of 16 should be heavily encouraged to take a self-defense and emergency response class.  This should be taught in our schools by trained professionals—teachers—who would work full-time in the schools as well and that would lead a crisis team in the event of an armed assailant.  It could even be worked directly into the physical fitness courses.

And finally, our country must have a serious discussion regarding its love of guns.  I'm rather neutral with respect for guns.  I'm not overly fond of them, but I understand the need for them (like hunting deer so that I don't have to hit them with my car).  I have a close friend, a gun enthusiast, that has offered repeatedly to take me to a local gun range, and I’m interested now more than ever to go with him and learn everything he has to teach me.  I’ve fired a few guns in my lifetime—a few times with my father and uncle—but I understand that guns are made for one thing—wounding or killing another animal or a human being.

The Second Amendment states, “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.”  And I agree whole-heartedly with this concept.  But we need to more closely examine the words of our founding fathers.  Even a cursory glance at Wikipedia’s article on the Second Amendment, http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Second_Amendment_to_the_United_States_Constitution, will tell you that the right to bear arms seems to have been interpreted many different ways by many different men.  Some mention a “well-regulated” or “properly formed” militia.  One would think that would imply gun owners to be registered and trained.  Others discuss the need to use them “against the red man and the beast of the forest.”  Some of the context seems vague or ambiguous at times, and very much outdated considering some of the language.  Perhaps an amendment to an amendment needs to occur.  And before anyone starts objecting to changes in law, such a thing is not unheard of, as the Eighteenth Amendment outlawed the sale and manufacturing of alcohol and then was repealed by the Twenty-first Amendment.  It’s happened, and I think it may need to happen again.

I’ve seen a lot of talk over the weekend with the usual adage that “guns don’t kill people, people kill people.”  That’s very true.  The only difference is that guns are specifically designed for the purpose of wounding or killing.  Knives are used to cut many things such as fabric, meat, etc.  A club is used for tenderizing meat or, say, pounding in a post.  Even bombs can be used by destruction companies and for transportation crews in building roads.  But guns serve no other person than to shoot something, and often times the wounds inflicted by them are deadly.

I read someone saying that cars kill more people than guns.  That’s true as well, but cars are primarily used to transport people.  They aren’t primarily used for wounding or death.  And, car owners have rigorous demands, including a title and tag at each sale, driver training, written test, driving test, health requirements, insurance on each vehicle, renewals and inspections, and penalties if these things aren’t met.  By contrast, my friend was able to buy an AK assault rifle through someone on Craiglist a few weeks ago—no questions asked--as if buying a gun is akin to buying used furniture or car parts.  The rate at which these mass shootings are happening, I wouldn’t be surprised if gun violence overtakes car crash deaths in the next few years.  After all, there are four times more guns than there are cars.  And when gun violence starts killing 2 or 4 or 8 times more people than it already does now, what then?

I firmly believe that you must be trained to own a gun.  That should be an absolute requirement--at least a 4-week training course with a permit given afterwards.  I also believe that guns must be registered in a national database.  It would also make a lot of sense that gun owners be required to have insurance on each gun owned, and if you argue that point, imagine your 16-year-old son with mental health issues taking your gun from your house and shooting up a school with it.  You don’t think civil action will be taken against you if you were even the tiniest amount negligent in the handling or storage of your firearms?  And as for other requirements, well, I would fully support health (particularly mental) exams as well.  You would not be permitted to purchase or own a gun until you passed that exam, and just like with the driving tests, after failing so many you'd be done.

But would these measures stop all gun violence?  No, of course not, but making it more difficult for people to legally own guns (and increasing the criminal penalties for violating those rules) would certainly have an impact on mass-shootings.  I can think of at least two—Jared Loughner and James Holmes—who would not have been able to own weapons had they been forced to take mental competency exams, and that may very well have prevented them from murdering dozens of people.

And even further, I don’t understand the need for amassing weapons.  To some, gun ownership is a hobby.  Like my good friend, people have several guns that they collect and shoot at a range.  I don’t see any problem with that.  But owning more than five guns seems a bit excessive.  I don’t think we should necessarily limit the number of guns people can own, but at least if we have them registered in a national database, the government will know which people around town own large number of guns so that they can keep an eye on them (or more importantly their teenage sons with mental health issues).  And if insurance is required on guns, that would prevent people from amassing large quantities of firearms.  Nobody would be willing to pay $50/year on 50 separate guns ($2500) in addition to permits, inspections, etc.

But the bottom line is, if someone has the motive and drive to hurt someone else, and nothing is done to prevent that person from doing so, he is going to do it.  In China’s Henan province, a man slashed 23 elementary school children the same day as the Newtown massacre.  All of those children survived though.  Had the man had an assault rifle, I doubt they’d have been so lucky.  But people will still make pipe bombs, and a pipe bomb tossed into a crowded area could cause just as many fatalities.

If everyone carried a gun, perhaps these massacres could be avoided (a highly reiterated theme of NRA members), but you simply can’t put a gun in everyone’s hand—especially children or hospital patients or the elderly, and most people won’t want them anyway.  That’s not the solution.  And even encouraging more people to carry will only end up putting them in the wrong hands.  Can you imagine how many road rage incidents or skirmishes in shopping lines during Black Friday would end in tragedy if more people walked around with hand guns?

In order to prevent massacres, we can’t just sit here and do nothing.  If we don't take action, this is going to keep happening.  We need to come up with a solution—a combination of actions—to stop the violence.  I am frustrated by the number of pro-gun people who say limiting guns is not the solution and the number of anti-gun people who say prohibiting guns is.  Most solutions are never as black and white as that.  The solution to this problem will happen only if numerous steps and actions are taken.

If a person needs mental help, especially a male in his teens or twenties with violent outbursts, we need to make sure he’s getting therapy and love and medicine.  We need to make sure that these people are cared for, and the duty falls not only on their parents (who are often times overwhelmed and solely blamed) but also on society.  Whether it be through discounts or subsidies to mental health services or outreach programs or whatever, the assistance needs to be apparent, cheap, and readily available for these individuals.  And we need to make sure these people have NO ACCESS TO GUNS.

We need to crack down harder on bullying.  I know it may sound like an unrelated issue, but it is not.  In twelve of fifteen cases of school shooting in the 90s, the perpetrators were bullied.  Kids who are bullied develop deep, long-lasting resentments toward their tormentors (and often school officials who allowed it to happen), and sometimes those resentments will result in retaliation.  Bullying needs to be a crime, and punishments for these crimes should be heavy, including steep fines, school suspensions and expulsions, and even prison in extreme cases.

We need to increase security everywhere—having trained professionals, likely armed, available everywhere to deal with this threat.  I recall my high school, 18 years ago or so, that had numerous doors unlocked during the day and no security whatsoever.  I think it might have acquired a security guard at one point, but from what I heard and understand, the man would not have been prepared at all to handle a situation like Columbine.  That needs to change, and if laws were enacted that would require trained security in high-occupancy buildings—we’d see a huge difference.  And you know, this would be a great job for all of those veterans returning from deployments.  And we need to seriously redefine our civilians’ rights to bear arms.  Not take guns away, but at least make it substantially harder for these troubled individuals to obtain their weapons.  Even the tiniest of steps on this front could make a huge difference.

Please, feel free to debate this with me by posting a comment below.